Kindergarten Uprising

Have you heard about the douchebags suing McDonald's for giving out toys with their Happy Meals? The Center for Science in the Public Interest (could that name be less specific?) plans to sue McDonald's for "unfairly and deceptively" marketing to children.

"McDonald's marketing has the effect of conscripting America's children into an unpaid drone army of word-of-mouth marketers, causing them to nag their parents to bring them to McDonald's," CSPI's head douchebag Stephen Gardner, wrote to the heads of the chain in a letter announcing the lawsuit.

What the what?!

I am pretty sure a plastic toy that gets thrown out 2 weeks after the fact is not the downfall of society. Nor is it causing childhood obesity. I am also fairly certain that this


isn't causing our children to become an "army of drones."

What is it doing? Giving moms 2 seconds of peace and quiet in the backseat of the car. That's what.

CSPI, leave our Happy Meal toys alone or you're going to have an uprising of 5 year olds everywhere. And let me tell you, 5 year olds fight dirty.