Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Busted!

I broke the law today. Twice. Okay, "law" is a bit strong. But I did break two rules today. And got into trouble.

The kids and I drove to the big city out of sheer boredom. I popped Cars into the one working car DVD player and the drive up was fairly smooth.

Got to the mall and hit a couple stores. Then we found one of those little coin operated ride on toys. This particular one was a little carousel with 3 separate "cars." One train, one boat, and one motorcycle. Fished the 75 cents out of my purse, got Cole into the train and Claire into the boat. Got the ride started.

Claire immediately panicked and was steering crazy carefully. It turns out she really thought she was steering the thing and thought she was going to crash horrifically if she stopped steering. It was way funny. Well, not to her. She will probably be traumatized and have a fear of boats for the rest of her life. But to me, funny. So what did I do? I grabbed my camera of course. Thus beginning my life of crime.

Do you see how Claire is looking just to my right? Yeah. I glanced over my shoulder to see what she was looking at. Turns out it was this.

Of course, this particular mall security man wasn't Kevin James. He was a 60 something man on a Segway with a helmet. A helmet, dear people. In the mall.

Anyway, he was all, "Ma'am. You can't take pictures in here." And I was all, "Seriously? Why not?" And he was all, "Ma'am. You need to put the camera away." And he waited as I put the weapon back into my bag. SERIOUSLY?

The man followed us the rest of the time. Now I ask you. Do I look like a hardended criminal? A menace to society?


Sure my forehead is a little oily. And I have some wild eyebrows. And there are a few hairs out of place. Okay, lots of hairs out of place. But really...do I look like threat?

Anyway, as much as I wanted to take my camera BACK out of my bag to snap him zipping around us the rest of the day, I didn't want to be hauled off to jail.

Shortly after the camera fiasco we headed for the play area so the kids could run off a little energy before lunch at CIP. I glanced at the sign and told the kids they had to keep their shoes on. I was much relieved because Cole had on his big ol' work boots and I really didn't feel like wrestling them off and on the child. So they played for awhile. I noticed so many kids were going barefoot. I found myself giving the moms dirty looks and staring at the kids and their law breaking feet. Many of them were young, just learning to toddlealong so I thought maybe that was it. But, still. There were a lot of barefeet running around that place.

*This is where I would normally post a picture of the law breakers and their barefeet.*

Anyway. I get tired of giving all the moms dirty looks and I am hungry! So we gather our stuff and head out. I glance at the sign again.

Wait, what's that say? "Shoes must be REMOVED before playing."

Oopsies.


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26 comments:

Lindsay said...

I had the same thing happen to me, too! We were on a "field trip" with the freshmen at our school, and another teacher goes to take some pictures for the yearbook of some students, and security rips her a new one about using her camera. She was fuming the rest of the day.

I also was personally accosted at a Barnes and Noble once because I was taking pictures. What, like I'm going to go to the local Books A Million and tell them all your secrets? Sheesh.

Melissa B. said...

You are SUCH a lawbreaker! My teacher friends have told me about your blog--if this post is any indication, you're a pretty funny gal! And as far as the Segway Security Man is concerned? I think HE was breaking the law, lookin' like that! :)

Kayla said...

See, now when we are ever around a play area that requires "no shoes" my kids have strict orders to "keep shoes on!" I have a serious case of OCD, and the whole bare foot thing grosses me out!

You must have been at some fancy mall, maybe they thought you were some kind of paparatzi!!

LINDA said...

I hope you have learned a vauable lesson...crime does not pay.
Another blog I read says she was in a shop and taking pics of her friend and a store person came over and freaked out on her about protecting the stores busines, etc. She toldthem she taking a pic of her friend but was compelled to leave anyway, having been made very uncomfortable.
Not to worry. I don't see this as becoming a bonnie/clyde lifestyle change for you. That would be hard to work into your schedule.....

Finding Normal said...

Crack me up! Why can't you use a camera in the MALL?!?!?! That's nuts! And aren't there shoplifters he should be worried about? Maybe he should go work at Olive Garden and watch the teenagers stealing the wine glasses!
I would so not be removing my kids' shoes in there, especially if they didn't have socks on! GROTTY!!!!!!!!!

sassy stephanie said...

Eww. I make mine keep them on. Gross baby athlete's foot going around. Well, prolly not really going to happen, but I am a germaphobe.

You rebel you.

Karen said...

I got into trouble once for taking a photo in Walmart!! I'm not kidding you, WALMART !!!

LOL, you probably would have given the poor man a heart attack, if he's noticed the kids playing in shoes. :-)

Yes, definitely a rebel :-)

Z's Mom said...

Ok, I'm laughing so hard at this post I might wake up my sleeping Zander. I break out in giggles everytime I scroll past the pic of Kevin James on that Segway.

You are too much!!! And your little Claire looks just like her mama.....

Ok, I'm laughing again....picturing that poor little girl furiously trying to steer her boat....

I have tears in my eyes....its late....I must be slightly delirious.

Caution Flag said...

I am getting so tired of how seriously store people are taking themselves! Use your cell phone next time; it's less obvious!

kmm0305 said...

I can't remember whose blog brought me to yours first, but I've since seen it linked on several--I recently joined SITS. Anyway, you are now on my daily blogstalk. And you inspired me to link my goodreads to my blog! :)

Maybe the security guard doesn't have many pictures from his childhood so he bans other mother's from making memories. I will say that I used to have my hair styled similar to yours (kind of flipped out in the back/sides) and one of the young kids with autism I worked with had a crush on me. He said it was because I had "Bad Guy" hair. So maybe you do look like a bad guy to some people! :P

Kristyn

Nik said...

ROFL!!!! YOU HEATHEN!! MISCREANT! (I used that word correctly didn't I???)

I loved this is just giggled. Thanks for sharing.

Love the new look too! It's beautiful...ok, the webpage is too not just the pic of you ;>

Rhea said...

You're living life on the edge, girlfriend, testing the rules like that. No pictures in the mall, seriously?! Give me a break.

And, the mall guard, on a Segway, are you kidding me?! Lazy bastards.

You're cracking me up.

Delberta said...

I hope that incident doesn't go on your permanent record. The mall probably has face recognition scanners installed and you will be banned! I am going to the mall today, with my camera, and take LOTS of pics ! Let's see if Mr. Segway will take on a hardened, middle aged, menopausal woman lol.

tinabean1988 said...

OK that is so funny.
What's the big deal about taking pictures of your own kids for goodness sack I could see if you were roaming around snapping pics at random of random children.
But your own kids?
I'm sorry but I would have gone off on him & I would have made him give me a good reason why I couldn't take pics of my own kids.
Then I would have left & taken a few more as I shopped just to piss him off & press my luck.

tinabean1988 said...

OH by the way, I totally don't see the hardened criminal in that pic.

Kat said...

Hey, little Miss has a name! So are your kids telling everyone that you got in trouble with a mall cop?

I read another blog the other day documenting a day at the mall...and she was stopped by security as well. Why can you not take pictures? Exactly what kind of security risk is there? Cause, you know, mom with two kids looks totally like a terrorist...Don't you just hate when you are profiled like that?

Breanne Vasquez said...

So funny - I am also wondering why you cant take pictures of your kids.

"The Queen in Residence" said...

You so look like a criminal and those kids, they have that look too, menace to society I tell you. Brother, what next, I mean really people. The paranoia level is really going over the top at public places. So sorry to hear about that, but I think I would have taken a picture of him and stated that I will be contacting the ACLU about this and see what the did? I mean really............But loved the pictures of the kids on those rides, they are so adorable!!!

Brandy said...

I cannot believe you aren't allowed to take pics at the mall...that's so weird. They shouldn't have activities for the kids then because anybody with half a brain knows mommies love pictures of their little darlins.

I think he wears the helmet b/c he has to enforce these dumb rules and he may have been smacked upside the head by a mommy has wasn't as compliant as you.

Brandy said...

I cannot believe you aren't allowed to take pics at the mall...that's so weird. They shouldn't have activities for the kids then because anybody with half a brain knows mommies love pictures of their little darlins.

I think he wears the helmet b/c he has to enforce these dumb rules and he may have been smacked upside the head by a mommy has wasn't as compliant as you.

cupcake said...

If they haul you off to the hoosegow, let me know. I'm a fabulous baker, and I promise you that I will have a nail file tucked away in your coffee cake.

I bet you could outrun the Segway, for what that's worth. But I so hope it would show up on the news so that the rest of us could enjoy the moment.

Sidney said...

Hahahahaha.....

That's all....

Just hahahahaha....

Mall Security...what a joke...my ex is Mary Kay security...what...to protect the world from legions of poor-skinned terrorists?

Crazy Daisy said...

no picture taking at the mall?! What kind of crazy rule is that?

Tammy said...

I've tried to take a picture of my grandkids at the mall and got the same treatment...sigh.....

And the last time I took them to the mall and got the shoes off and they scattered to play...well then we were told to clear out as it was cleaning time. My grandson worried me for the rest of the day as to why they could not play at the mall...silly people, why don't they clean after hours???

And No you don't look like a hardened criminal!

I enjoy your blog!!☼

Deanna said...

I wondered what you look like! Now I know the face behind the...voice?...typing?...blogging? Ya know what I mean! And that thing at the playground sounds exactly like something I'd do! I would have been giving Mr. Robo-Security some dirty looks, too.

The Nice One said...

Oh my gosh, a HELMET? Well, I'll be.

Too funny about the shoes!!!